I'm sure this is a problem area in all households. It just seems to be a fact of life and an insight into how human beings behave in their true nature as they are growing up. I always try to imagine myself in the shoes of the peope I encounter, so that I understand how and why they are communicating to me in the way that they do. So, from the words of my daughters and my fractured memories of being a teenager, I try to weave a plausible understanding of where they are coming from -- what intent they have, what motive they have, whether they seem to be responding to the lessons that I and my wife try to teach them about life and responsibility. But I always remember that they are not me. They are unique creations of the Father's hand with their own innate personality and weaknesses or strengths. I have a responsibility to the Father to carefully shape them into fully functioning adults up to the moment that they finally take wing and fly from the nest. And I'm sure I'll still have responsibilities to them after they are independent. I willingly would help them in any way that I could at that point because I still love them very dearly and want what's best for them in God's eyes. I want them to have a joyous life in their walk with the Lord and to have close communion with the Father just as I have had. I want them to see the Father the way I see Him now in His indescribable love for us. But I must always remember that I am not the best judge of what's best for them. God is. And I cannot see all the multitudinous variables that can and will contront them in life. But God can. So I always have to remember that my children are a precious gift of the Father to me on loan. I do not own them, but I am responsible for the outcome of their character as they grow in their walk with the Lord. Perhaps my overwatch responsibilities will be lifelong as I will always be lovingly concerned for their well-being, even when they are independent just as our Father in Heaven is so lovingly engaged in and concerned for His children throughout the Earth. It is a humbling thought to realize what a glorious process I have been involved in. I am working for the Master, doing His will, as He has guided me, and I have submitted to His hand ever learning while I am going through the process of teaching. But in this process, I realize that the best way to communicate what is right and good is to actually do it in front of them. They must see me carrying out all the principles that I have taught to them from the Lord so they will know that it is important and that it is do-able. When they see an example of how its done, then they will learn much more than my nagging or constant reminders will ever possibly teach them. I just have to keep my patience and speak often with the Lord to be reminded what specifically I am supposed to do to help them learn responsibility in any given teachable moment. We as a family are all growing together, simultaneously learning the lessons that God has prepared for us as individuals. They have some growing up to do, but I also still need some guidance in my growth toward the man that would best please God.